What are Core Wounds?

Core wounds are types of heartaches and pains that were experienced as children that gave shape to the person we are today. They can be as simple as a parent lying to a child resulting in trust issues as an adult, or more complex forms to abuse leading to low self-esteem in adulthood. Either way each wound is carved into the life through different incidences and experiences that the child faces growing up. Being exposed to traumatic experiences will either create a person who is victimized or a champion who rose above it all.

Core wounds mostly come from parents, immediate family or the care-takers of the child. What happens is a child who is trusting suddenly discovers the uncharted territory of fear. To a child fear is an introduced emotion that is, unfortunately, introduced pretty early on this day and age. Our society is full of fearful citizens who were this trusting child before they were thrust into the fear-based reality. Passing on fear through the generations has become the second nature now; adults do it automatically and unintentionally.

Who is the Inner Child?

There is an inner child within all of us. He/she resides in our hearts. This sweet, trusting child never wishes ill upon anyone. All he/she wants is love. A world full of love is the expectation. Reality hits hard when one is born on Earth. Nothing is as the inner child was expecting. An angel is dropped off in hell, so to speak….

Traditionally, childbirth was done standing up while the mother held on to something with both her hands. This was simply the use of gravity to provide an easy passage for the new child. BUT… now the birth is done lying on a bed, defying gravity. The grand entry to Earth is a bit more difficult than expected. Everyone in the background is yelling “PUSH” unleashing complete madness. Then as soon as the child is born he/she is slapped in the ass and starts crying. Hence, trauma is experienced immediately upon introduction to the new life as an infant.

 

Then of course the baby is left to cry on its own countless times, creating. abandonment issues. Or maybe the parents think the television would be a better companion, thereby, removing the aspect of nurture from the child’s life. If a baby is given the chance to be held by the mother, feel the warmth of the human skin and is attended to when crying, he/she learns how humans should care for each other. The inner child is then happy as a result of being cared for and loved.

This is VERY important to the child and the inner child. When a child feels unloved, they will not know that they are lovable. They will think that they are not worthy of love. They will suppose that no one can love them and that it is their fault. That is the heartbreaking part. To love others, one must learn to love themselves. As parents and adults we must teach children that they are worthy of being loved so that they can love themselves and BE love. That way they can spread love while having plenty of love in reserve.

 

Types of Trauma

Abandonment

Abandonment is one of the most common core wounds that many struggle with every single day. Some are not even aware that it is an issue. Often the snowball effect takes place, as more trauma accumulates while rolling into adulthood. Life can begin to spin out of control as fearful emotions surface in relationships. Fear of abandonment inevitably leads to relationship issues, which eventually result in a set of hurt people who pass their hurt around to others unknowingly.

When a parent is late in arriving to pick up a child from school, for example, the child gets scared. Why isn’t my mom here? Did something happen? Did she forget about me? How could she forget? If it happens regularly, the child begins to feel they are dispensable and unimportant in the eyes of the parents. Everyone else’s parents love them. Not she/he. There must be something wrong with them. Then carrying that into adulthood, there is no one to tell them that if a relationship doesn’t work out, it’s not because they are not worthy or valuable, it’s simply because the two individuals don’t match. The abandonment issue causes them to think that everyone will leave them.

Trust Issues

When a parent lies to a child, it might seem harmless. Just a white lie. When the child finds out they have been lied to, their world comes crashing down. Then they become suspicious of everyone. As adults, lying becomes something common. However, honesty is one of the most important aspects in human relationships, including the relationship with one’s self. If the truth is acknowledged from within, there is no need to lie to ourselves or others about anything. Truth becomes simply the truth, regardless of other people’s opinions or criticisms. Then there is no fear of judgement.

Abuse

Abuse is a big one. Verbal, physical and sexual abuse are more common than we think. That is pure, unadulterated trauma.

As a child, when I used to do something that adults considered wrong, instead of explaining the reasons, they would just yell at me or punish me. Some of the things I got punished for, I have yet to understand the reasons behind. When I tried to explain, it was seen as me being argumentative. So, I kept my mouth shut. For a long time I kept my mouth shut because I thought no one wanted to listen or cared enough to know. In relationships with people, it’s important to speak out so both parties can understand  each other. Unspoken issues escalate into bigger issues later on.

Sexual abuse is experienced by many children, though we live in denial. The children blame themselves. That’s how the mind of a child works. Anything negative that happens causes them fear and becomes their fault. As adults, because they blame themselves, accepting mistreatment from people becomes a norm. Uncultivated confidence and low self-esteem doesn’t allow them to feel that they deserve better things in life. They look for love in others but due to their broken spirit, they will look for it in the wrong people. This toxic pattern creates a life that can seem like a constant train wreck.

Low Self-Worth

Every child wants to be told  that they are valuable. They want to know that what they do is worth something and that they are important. When a child draws a picture, if you show them that it is beautiful and it has value, you are setting the child up for success. Unfortunately, many children have busy parents who constantly forget to acknowledge and show appreciation towards their creations and accomplishments. Creativity and imagination is food for the mind, especially a growing child’s mind. In addition to developing artistic talents, creative work develops thinking skills that helps a child to be more versatile and resourceful when tackling life.

The sense of value provided to children by their parents equates to the value they place upon their gifts and skills. When a child grows up feeling undervalued, mental blocks can develop which may prevent them from ever pursuing their passions in life. They will become overly critical of themselves because while growing up, their role models conveyed the idea that what they had to offer was useless. In order to break away from the idea that their work is not worthy to be shared with society, so many fears must be fought with. Due to a fear of failure,  many, as adults, don’t get a chance to learn that the key to happiness is following their dreams and passions.

Rejection comes in many forms and is another aspect that goes hand in hand with low self- worth. A less obvious form of rejection can be a narcissistic parent dismissing what a child values, considering it nonsense. A child who prefers trees over video games, for example, may be called eccentric. An action that is not taken toward what society deems important or toward meeting society’s definition of success is looked down upon. Rejection causes low self-confidence and low self-esteem.

Conclusion

In conclusion, this article is intended to point out that we can easily underestimate the effects of certain daily actions that are potentially detrimental to a child’s developing mind and can dictate the course of their life. As adults, it is our duty to teach children how to be the most outstanding versions of themselves. We need to be aware of our core issues in order to begin the journey of healing ourselves from within.

The Core Wounds Healing session that I offer is created to identify these traumas and help break unhealthy patterns through healing. This way those traumas will not be passed on to future generations. It can help find answers to questions regarding why certain things are happening and why certain blocks exist. Karma, traumas, blocks, negative energy pools in the form of blocks and cords linking toxic people result in energy drain. This can result in feelings of depression, sadness, fatigue, loss of hope, etc. creating dissatisfaction in life.

The etheric body and aura, though many can’t see it is full of these blocks and traumas that need to be healed so energy can flow properly. When the auric field is weak, there could be entity attachments that are taking your energy. “Energy vampires” is another common factor. These people suck other people’s energy in order to thrive, because they cannot create their own positive energy. Healing core wounds can help shield the aura and protect your energy.